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Blabbing about Justin Bieber’s Great Gatsby party? That’ll cost you $3 Million!

Blabbing about Justin Bieber’s Great Gatsby party? That’ll cost you $3 Million!
November 18, 2013 JEREMY FEIST

Justin Bieber

Considering the last major thing we heard about Justin Bieber involved him being filmed the morning after spending the night with a Brazilian prostitute bodybuilder lady, his security team has apparently decided to beef up their muzzling efforts. Over the weekend, Justin Bieber had a Great Gatsby-themed party (like Justin ever read The Great Gatsby …) where all his guests were forced to sign non-disclosure agreements with fines of $3 Million for blabbing to the press. Of course, we’re reporting on it, so just assume someone had $3 Million handy. TMZ reports …

Guests and workers signed a confidentiality agreement — obtained by TMZ — in which they agreed not to tweet, text, phone, Facebook, record, write or in any other manner spill the beans on what went on inside. Apparently a lot went on … Sheriff’s deputies were called three times for noise complaints, and a neighbor tells us one deputy told him when the front door opened he caught a strong whiff of weed. The document provides … anyone who violates the confidentiality agreement will automatically be on the hook for $3 mil … no trial, no arguing, just pay up.

Aside from the fact that The Great Gatsby was basically one long screed against the mindless self-indulgence that Justin encapsulates, and that his throwing a party based on the book is just him taking a sh!t on F. Scott Fitzgerald‘s message, really? $3 Million? We already know that he sleeps with prostitutes, what could he be hiding at this point? Does he serve his guests Monkey Brains like they did in Temple of Doom? Because now that I say that out loud that sounds like something he’d do. SOMEONE SAVE THE MONKEYS!

Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.