Ashton Kutcher is still whorin’ it out!

Ashton Kutcher

When we last left Ashton Kutcher, he was under fire for using his position as a guest editor for Details magazine to pimp out a bunch of useless shit that he invested in. But now he’s learned the error of his ways and has now moved onto screwing up his marriage to Demi Moore and – oh, wait, never mind, it looks like Gawker‘s reporting that he’s still pimping shit out, this time on Two and a Half Men.

I put a bunch of … portfolio companies [on the laptop] … I pulled it off for, like, one episode and then CBS came in and told me they were going to have to take all the companies off of the laptop because they didn’t want to promote companies they weren’t taking a piece of or something. I don’t know exactly why … so, now they’re greeking all of the stickers that were on there.

Man, Ashton Kutcher is just a shameless peddler, isn’t he? I mean, it’s almost enough to make you miss the days of Charlie Sheen. I mean yes, he’s an utter sociopath and made life impossible for the cast and crew of the show, but at least he didn’t use the show to promote things he liked. Mostly because if he did, the show would have just been an hour-long infomercial for brothels and crystal meth dealers. “For more information on the meth you saw on tonight’s episode, see Stinky Pete outside that nail salon on Rodeo Drive. Just don’t wear bright colors around him, or he will try to scratch your face off.”

Ashton Kutcher

About JEREMY FEIST 5002 Articles
Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.