Quantcast
WHEN MUSIC POPS, WE TURN IT UP

Ariana Grande is haunted by demons apparently!

Ariana Grande is haunted by demons apparently!
November 7, 2013 JEREMY FEIST

Ariana Grande

I’ll be honest: I don’t know much about Ariana Grande other than she and MIKA did a pseudo-cover of Wicked‘s “Popular” and Rich Juzwiak called her album Yours Truly, the Pizza Hut of R&B. Mmmmmmm … Pizza Hut. Anyway, I’m sure she’s perfectly sweet and dear. Anyway, in an interview with Complex magazine, Grande told a story about how she visited one of the seven portals to Hell on Earth and ended up being plagued by demons. So that happened.

I felt this sick, overwhelming feeling of negativity over the whole car and we smelled sulfur, which is the sign of a demon, and there was a fly in the car randomly, which is another sign of a demon. I was like, “This is scary, let’s leave.” I rolled down the window before we left and said, “We apologize. We didn’t mean to disrupt your peace.” Then I took a picture and there are three super distinct faces in the picture—they’re faces of textbook demons.

Let’s see the picture.
I deleted it. The next day I tried to send the picture to my manager and it said, “This file can’t be sent, it’s 666 megabytes.” I’m not kidding. I used to have a folder called “Demons” that had pictures with all the screencaps in it, but then weird things started happening to me so I deleted it.

Like all paranormal mysteries, there’s a perfectly logical explanation for this …

Ariana: Hello? Is anyone there?
???: Hissssssssssss … you’ll test well with girls 16-24. My daughters Kendall and Kylie have a show you can guest on.
Ariana: Oh gawd, the demon is back!
???: Would you be willing to perform at my daughter’s wedding? She’s marrying Kanye West. SCREEEEEEEE!
Ariana: Don’t make me get the holy water.
???: How do you feel about getting peed on for a sex tape? SQUAAAAAAAA!!! Just think of the ratings!

Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.