you didnt hear it from me…by nikkib    issue no. 24 on popbytes You really haven’t heard it from me lately, huh? Sorry I’ve been MIA, but the holidays have caught up with me. I’ve made Christmas throw up in my house and as of this weekend I’m about 95% done with my shopping. I’ve found the most fabulous new foundation! (Sorry for the guys who don’t care about this – altho I suspect a couple of you actually do) It’s Vincent Longo Dew Finish and it’s so packed full of stuff that’s good for your skin that my skin actually looks better without makeup now, too! It feels really light going on, but it’s got great coverage without feeling heavy or cakey. It FEELS lighter than a tinted moistuerizer, but I swear it gives better coverage.

Anyway, like you, I’m going to be really busy over the next few weeks. I’ll be back in January! While I’m gone, take a look at this Ofoto album. My husband swears that it has been obviously photo shopped, but I’m not so sure. Let me know what you think!

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Wasn’t I just asking you about Portia?! Now we have our answer! And this is just my opinion…but I
don’t think this is another Ellen n’ Anne situation, as is being hinted here. Just because the media
wasn’t talking about Portia’s sexuality doesn’t mean that she just suddenly turned gay a’la Ms.
Heche.
Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi are shacking up after ditching their longtime lady loves. On
Friday it was reported that DeGeneres had split with her girlfriend of four years,
photographer-director Alexandra Hedison. We’re told the real reason for the break is that DeGeneres
is now deeply in love with de Rossi, the Australian-born ‘Arrested Development’ diva. De Rossi
recently dumped her longtime gal pal, singer-songwriter Francesca Gregorini (Ringo Starr’s
stepdaughter) to be with DeGeneres, a source close to the new couple told PAGE SIX’s Jared Paul
Stern. The pair are now in DeGeneres’ house in the Hollywood Hills which Hedison left a couple weeks
ago. DeGeneres, 46, and de Rossi, 31, first met nine months ago on a photo shoot, we’re told. They
fell ‘instantly in love,’ de Rossi gushed to pals at the time. But DeGeneres remained loyal to
Hedison, whom she often credited with ‘saving her life’ at a time of crisis. However, when DeGeneres
and de Rossi met up again at VH1′s ‘Big in ’04′ awards gala in L.A. on Dec. 1, events took their
natural course. Their respective girlfriends were absent, and this time there was no stopping the
lusty ladies. They managed to find a private spot and ‘things got so hot and heavy between them that
they raced to a limo and fooled around for hours,’ our source reports. The very next day de Rossi
left Gregorini, saying she was madly in love with DeGeneres, and DeGeneres asked Hedison to move out
of their house, though we’re told the pair plan to make it seem they were already single in order to
minimize the fallout. Reps for DeGeneres and de Rossi could not be reached for comment. ‘Alexandra
and Francesca are both devastated,’ says a source close to the women. ‘Neither of them had any idea
what was coming.’ There is obviously some bitterness, and while some friends speculate that
DeGeneres and de Rossi were secretly seeing each ever since they first met, others snipe that de
Rossi is out for all the publicity she can get with a new high-profile relationship. ‘People who
know Ellen well feel she is going through a midlife crisis, dumping Alexandra for a hot, younger
woman,’ says our snitch. ‘They predict Ellen will come to her senses and dump Portia to go back to
Alexandra in the near future.’ – {pagesix.com}

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Nope, I still don’t like Scarlett.
It didn’t look like anything was ‘Lost in Translation’ when Derek Jeter chatted up Scarlett
Johansson the other night in Los Angeles. The Yankee captain and the Oscar nominee were tucked into
a booth at Microsoft’s holiday party last Thursday at Geisha House, the new Hollywood club owned by
Ashton Kutcher, Danny Masterson, Dul

you didnt hear it from me…by nikkib    issue no. 23 on popbytes I thought I would brighten everyone’s week by giving you a new list: Celebs I Can’t Stand! Isn’t that fun? I thought about this way too hard and therefore probably missed some obvious choices. As with my celebrity boyfriends list, I’m sure this will be ever-changing. 5 Penelope Cruz Salma Hayek was here first and besides, she’s hotter. 4 Melanie Griffith Obvious craziness aside, I just can’t get over that horrible ‘Antonio’ tat on her arm. 3 Michael Rappaport I can’t explain it, I’ve just always hated him.

2 Jude Law Sexiest Man Alive? I knew I hated People Magazine for more reasons than their crappy stories. Jude Law wins Girliest Man Alive for me. 1 Elizabeth Hurley I don’t feel as though I need to explain myself. Suffice it to say that I’ve hated her since that horrible Versace safety pin dress. Honorable Mentions: Renee Zellwegger, Nicole Kidman, Russell Crowe, Usher, Celine Dion Now, just to prove to you all that I’m not all negative, here’s a list of my favorite things this week (in no particular order): • Veronica Mars • Wendy’s single combo (biggie sized with a diet coke, of course) • Pork Chops as the only entree at a wedding reception (ballsy, go Kate!) • Mary Kate & Ashley lip gloss • Cooking meals in my slow cooker • My Baby Jake

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If Lindsay Lohan & Mischa Barton go to rehab do you think they could take Tara Reid for us, too?
Is there anything better than a crazy rumor that we can’t confirm? Now this might be the
Glade-and-Sharpie cocktail we just huffed talking, but the plastic pumpkin left over from Halloween
told us a rumor that Mischa Barton and Lindsay Lohan are going on vacation together. No word on
where they’re going, but they should be back in 28 days or so. We know! Totally nuts, right? Didn’t
Lohan just get back to work on Herbie: Fully Loaded after her hospital stay? Isn’t Barton shooting
The O.C.? And what are the odds they’d both take trips at the same time with their crazy schedules?
Never mind. This Sharpie is spent and Mr. Pumpkin is threatening to eat our soul if we don’t run out
to the Office Depot for a refill. That crazy devil pun’kin! – {defamer.com}

you didnt hear it from me…by nikkib    issue no. 22 on popbytes I’m dying to know…is anyone watching ‘Joey?’ It looks horrific. I’m pretty sure this is Kelly Ripa – and it makes me really like her. Which wholesome chat show hostess had a nursery-type room constructed so she could bring her kids to work? ‘Sadly, she never does,’ reports our spy. ‘What she does do after every show is sit in her dressing room and down a glass of Merlot and smoke three Marlboro Lights to combat her daily anxiety” – {pagesix.com}

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Poor Ethan Hawke, he looks awful lately and no one is interested in him anymore. Come to think about it, who really cares about Uma either (besides being creeped out by that weird bf)?
Ethan Hawke has sparked speculation he’s dating Julie Delpy, after being spotted on a romantic date with the French beauty.
The pair, co-stars in ‘Before Sunrise’ and ‘Before Sunset,’ were spotted enjoying a cosy lunch together at the trendy New York City eatery Le Gamin – with Hawke’s 2-year-old son Roan in tow.
An onlooker says, ‘They were whispering, locking eyes and grinning at each other. At one point, Julie tossed her head back and laughed flirtatiously at him.’
Once their lunch concluded, the trio untied Hawke’s dog from the restaurant’s bench and went for a stroll.
A source tells Us Weekly, ‘They seemed happy. He put his arm around her.’
Both stars’ representatives insist they’re just friends. Hawke is currently estranged from wife Uma Thurman. – {the daily dish, sfgate.com}

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Does Star have a weird fat-girl complex that she’s marrying an obviously gay man?! I mean, come on! This guy isn’t even on the down-low�.
Al Reynolds stayed away from other women Saturday night when he partied without his fiancee, Star
‘Bridezilla’ Jones, who’s in Dallas with the crew from ‘The View’ � but he wasn’t alone. Reynolds
went to a gay-friendly Halloween bash at Belluno on East 40th Street. ‘Al was there as a male
stripper,’ said our spy. ‘He had on a tiny, tiny speedo with a white bathrobe over it � he has great
abs! He was there with some friends who were dressed as King Tut, a leatherman, a cop, a cowboy and
a pirate � they were all clearly gay. Some of them he knew from before Star, but he was getting to
know the others.’ Reynolds introduced himself to our spy, who mistook him for Jones’ makeup man.
Reynolds quickly corrected him and said, ‘No. I’m marrying her.’ One of Reynolds’ entourage added:
‘And he’s very scared.’ The speedo is a holdover from last year’s Halloween party, where Reynolds
wore it as part of his Bam Bam costume. Jones’ rep sent us a statement saying: ‘Star and Al are
happily planning their wedding, which is less than a month away, and don’t plan to entertain
anything that would rob them of their joy.’ – {pagesix.com}
�

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I don’t think Seth & Summer are engaged, but I am REALLY excited for ‘The OC’ tonight.
The OC’ stars and onscreen lovers Adam Brody and Rachel Bilson reportedly have secretly gotten
engaged in real life. Brody and Bilson play teenagers Seth Cohen and Summer Roberts respectively on
the hit TV show, which follows the tangled love lives of rich youngsters living in Orange County,
Calif. The onscreen couple have tried to hide their offscreen romance for as long as possible. In
addition to the engagement rumor, they also have been spied looking for a house together in Los
Angeles. A source at Fox television network says, ‘They are both so much in love and want to settle
down together. ‘Adam went down on bended knee in a very traditional way and they plan to get married
in the new year. It’s the talk of the set, but they have been trying to keep it quiet.’ – {the daily dish, sfgate.com}
�

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I hope this isn’t true.
Marcia Cross plays supermom Bree on the hit series ‘Desperate Housewives’-but in real life, she
backed out of an adoption because she refused to sacrifice her career to be a stay-at-home
mom!DESPERATE That’s the stunning charge of Jessica Ridner, 32, whose heart was broken in May when
the actress decided not to adopt her child-just as production was gearing up for the darkly humorous
ABC drama about the secret lives of suburban housewives. ‘Marcia had promised me that she would be a
stay-athome mother to my baby, but it was all a big lie,’ Jessica told The ENQUIRER. ‘Two months
after she backed out, I saw promos on TV for ‘Desperate Housewives.’ Everything made sense. I
understood why Marcia changed her mind-she was working! ‘Marcia had been planning to go back to
working long days, leaving my baby in the hands of nannies and hired caretakers-even though she knew
that wasn’t what I wanted for my child. ‘She had to have been filming the show while we were waiting
for the baby to be born. She outright lied to me, and I’m still very, very angry. ‘I was giving up
my baby so he would have a better life, but she had no intention of being the kind of mother I
wanted for my baby.’ The ENQUIRER first reported in June that never-married Marcia, 43, had
contracted to adopt Jessica’s baby. But when the baby was born prematurely with some health
problems, Marcia allegedly got cold feet. The adoption was canceled. ‘I was shocked,’ said Jessica.
‘Everything was set. Marcia had even picked out a name-Harrison. Marcia called me and said the
adoption was off. She said she didn’t have time to come to Nebraska and be with the baby in the
hospital. ‘I didn’t understand how she could back away so coldly. What kind of mother can’t take the
time to be with her sick child? But now I know. Her work came before her baby.’ When contacted by
The ENQUIRER, Marcia’s publicist refused to comment on the situation. Jessica named the baby boy
Nickolas Matthew-Nick Knack, for short. He weighed just 3 pounds, 4 ounces, but was breathing on his
own and doctors were optimistic that he would make it. Tragically, a week later, he died. ‘Marcia
sent me $300 toward the funeral, but she didn’t send flowers or even a card. And I never heard from
her again,’ said Jessica. Jessica, a recently divorced single mother of five, works full-time in
client services for Hewlett Packard, but she’d much rather be home with her kids. ‘I leave work, go
to the store and go home to cook for them and help them with their homework-all the things a real
mom does,’ she said. ‘I have no choice but to work. But Marcia, who has plenty of money, had
promised me that she’d be a homebody for at least the first few years of my baby’s life. ‘Obviously,
her words meant nothing.’ The ENQUIRER has learned that the ‘Desperate Housewives’ star is still
hoping to adopt. ‘A baby is still in her future plans,’ Marcia’s mother, Janet Cross, told The
ENQUIRER. ‘Marcia’s new show came at a good time, to distract her about what happened to the baby
she planned to adopt earlier this year. But Marcia still has her dream to become a mother.’ – {NationalEnquirer.com}
�

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Ok, I know I’m a week late – but does anyone really think these artists are performing ‘live’ on these shows? Maybe I’m jaded, but I usually only think it’s live if it sounds like shit. And I’m sorry, I love Em – but what’s the difference between a vocal track and lip synching? It’s just a technicality.
Does any singer take the ‘live’ in ‘Saturday Night Live’ seriously? Just one week after Ashlee
Simpson lip-synched on the show, was found guilty of the same crime. ‘He was singing ‘Mosh’ and you
could tell he was lip-synching,’ said our source. ‘The track was just a bit ahead of his lips and he
put the mike down at one point but the track kept going.’ Eminem’s rep said he was merely trying to
‘duplicate the sound on his album. He had a vocal track on for double vocal effect [on the first
song], to make it more powerful. Lots of hip-hop artists do that. Tupac [Shakur] did it.’ – {pagesix.com}

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I definitely think this blind item is Queen Latifah. Lately I’ve been obsessing about how great her PR people must be. I mean, how many actresses do you know who get busted for pot possession and a DUI and still manage to get an Oscar nom? I mean, it’s not like these indiscretions happened a long time ago. She’s got deals with Pizza Hut and Cover Girl, she’s America’s newest sweetheart! Something’s fishy – and it’s not just rumors about her preferred partners.
Adored Ava has it all-fame, wealth, sex partners, big boobs. She also has quite the past, including
sex with heaps of men, women, tools, tiaras, you shocked-to-the-hilt name it! Sounds exhausting, but
whatever; let’s get on with the rubbed-raw goods, shall we? A2, one of those multitalented,
multicareered types, has been raking in the cashola as of late. Deals out the wazoo trading on her
famous-and infamous-past. But turns out people have no idea just how peppery that personal history
is. Orgies weren’t-and aren’t-an uncommon occurrence in Ava’s life. And certain journalists know
exactly what makes Ms. Adored roar. That’s why they’ve got a deal. A deal for A.A. to cooperate with
them on a regular basis. Otherwise? The grimy goods get printed-every last drop of unsafe and
unsanitary to-do. They know it. Ava knows it. – {the awful truth, eonline.com}

src="http://popbytes.com/img/u-didnt.gif" border=0 width=200 height=255 alt="you didnt hear it from me..." hspace=4>

you didnt hear it from me…by nikkib    issue no. 21 on popbytes Hey there, gossip lovers! I have a few confessions to make. First, as it turns out, not only do I feel sorry for Jennifer Lopez, but I actually LIKE Ben Affleck. He’s just so damn likeable, even when he’s lame. Have you seen him on SNL? Second, I’m totally addicted to morning reality show, ‘Starting Over.’ And finally, I’m having an increasingly harder time keeping up with this newsletter. I don’t want to stop, but I’m going to have to cut back to sending it out every other week. The up-side of this is that I can actually devote time to making it better; the down-side is that it won’t be as timely. Please feel free to email me and let me know what you think of any of these startling confessions.

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I wonder if Gwen would be mad if she knew that a friend of a friend of a friend of mine slept with Gavin while they were engaged?!
Gwen Stefani is devastated after discovering that her husband Gavin Rossdale has a teenage
lovechild. British newspaper the Daily Mirror reports that a DNA test has proved that the Bush
singer, 38, is the father of his goddaughter 15-year-old model Daisy Lowe after a brief fling with
her fashion designer mother Pearl, 33. An insider told the newspaper, ‘Pearl has always wondered if
Gavin is Daisy’s father. Both she and Daisy felt they deserved to know the truth so they decided to
find out. It was never about getting Gavin’s money or anything like that. It was about finding
Daisy’s real dad.’ Following a series of legal letters, the Everything Zen singer agreed to take a
DNA test and Pearl discovered the results last week. The source continued, ‘Even though she had
requested the test herself, Pearl was really shocked. She has always had suspicions, but it only
really occurred to her in the last six months that Gavin could actually be Daisy’s dad. They only
had a very brief fling way back when. ‘Gavin was reluctant to do the test as he didn’t think he was
Daisy’s dad. They were good friends but it has all become slightly awkward now.’ Pearl confirmed the
news saying, ‘It is true but I really don’t want to talk about this.’ Rossdale also validates the
news, ‘Yes, it’s true but out of respect to all parties concerned, I’ve no further comment.’ No
Doubt singer Stefani is really shaken by the news because she has as yet been unable to have
children with her partner of eight years. The source continued, ‘It sounds like Gwen is really upset
about it and it’s causing rows between her and Gavin.’ – {the daily dish, sfgate.com}

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Kirsten attempts to cleanse herself after associating with scummy Rick Salomon, but I don’t think it will last.
Hollywood hunk Jake Gyllenhaal and his actress ex Kirsten Dunst are back together again – only five
months after splitting. Jake’s sister Maggie – who co-starred with Dunst in ‘Mona Lisa Smile’ -
introduced the handsome couple in 2002 and they dated for two years before splitting in June. The
forthcoming issue of American magazine U.S. Weekly has exclusive pictures of the reunited pair in
Los Angeles, who were spotted kissing in a car last Tuesday. And according to gossip site
Pagesix.com, later on last week Dunst and Gyllenhaal were partying at Brent Bolthouse’s bash in LA’s
Concorde Club. According to onlookers, ‘They were making out like crazy.’ – {the daily dish, sfgate.com}

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I can’t believe I ever thought that Nicky was the ‘smart Hilton sister.’
Nicky Hilton thinks that the actresses who played her and her sister in ‘White Chicks’ weren’t,
like, you know, hot enough. Stuff magazine asked Hilton what she thought of being spoofed in the
film. ‘Imitation is the highest form of flattery,’ Hilton told the November issue of the mag. ‘I
just wished the two chicks who played us were hotter. They were kind of funny looking.’ – {the scoop, msnbc.com}

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Is it just me or is something weird about this story? Eminem’s uncle killed himself because the Sheriff’s dog was bothering him? What?!? What bothers ME is that Eminem is said to be dating Kim again. Sigh!
Eminem is inconsolable after discovering the uncle he called ‘dad’ killed himself. The rap star’s
real father deserted him when he was a baby so he was raised by Todd Nelson, who shot himself in the
head, allegedly because he was being terrorized by a sheriff’s rottweiler. Nelson is Eminem’s second
close relative to kill himself – the hip-hop artist’s other uncle, Ronnie Mathers, killed himself
last year following a traumatic break-up. A family friend explains, ‘This news has hit him hard. It
will bring back all the memories of losing Ronnie. To lose two uncles at such a young age is
terribly sad, especially as his father has never been around. The fact they both committed suicide
is so tragic.’ Eminem’s grandmother tells Britain’s Daily Mirror newspaper, ‘Todd had been upset
about a rottweiler owned by a local sheriff who was causing problems for his family. The dog scared
his girlfriend’s son and scratched their car. ‘But when he complained to police, they wouldn’t do
anything about it. He shot himself in his car in his own backyard. My grandson, Todd Jr., found his
body.’ – {the daily dish, sfgate.com}

you didnt hear it from me…by nikkib    issue no. 20 on popbytes this week i was planning on telling you all that i’m starting to have second thoughts about jho. i was starting to feel sorry for her…married to that troll, marc anthony. she looked absolutely miserable on oprah. her make-up is horrific since firing scott barnes. but then my friend, ellie, sent me this great review of jen’s new movie, ‘shall we dance?’ and i figured we should�have one more week of jho-bashing. the headline read, ‘shall we barf?’ ha ha ha ha!!

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thanks, jack! what is jack nicholson’s beef with alec baldwin? nicholson was dining with a male pal at da silvano thursday night, when baldwin, at a table nearby, tried to say hello. ‘alec walked over to jack’s table with his date and stood there for like five minutes,’ said our spy. ‘he tried to say hello, but jack ignored him. finally alec put his hand out in front of jack to shake hands and jack looked at him, put his hands up and said, ‘sorry. can’t shake. got grease all over my hands,’ and went back to talking to his friend. it was really embarrassing.’ – {pagesix.com}

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zach braff and mandy moore � i like it. scrub the natalie portman rumors. zach braff and mandy moore are young hollywood’s new ‘it’ couple. sources close to the pair say they’ve been quietly dating for several weeks, even hitting hollywood hot spots like spider club. braff, 29, who’s currently filming his hit tv series ‘scrubs’ and working on the animated movie ‘chicken little,’ split from longtime girlfriend, ‘nypd blue’ actress bonnie summerville over the summer. braff and portman were linked after starring together in ‘garden state,’ braff’s writing and directing debut, but friends denied they were ever together. meanwhile, moore, 20, famously dated tennis ace andy roddick until last march. look for more from braff and moore. ‘they are a good match – they are both so earnest!’ joked a source friendly with the couple. – {Elisa Lipsky-Karasz, NYPost.com}

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as much as i want to believe this about paris because i’m sooo sick of her, i have a hard time believing anything oily bo-hunk, brandon davis, says. hollywood oil heir brandon davis just poured gasoline on the paris hilton n-word furor, claiming that hilton regularly uses the racial slur as well as slurs against other minorities. davis, an old friend of hilton who had a falling out with her this year, came forward after it was reported that hilton used the n-word in a scene caught on videotape. hilton later issued a statement saying, ‘anyone who knows me knows that this is not me. i love everybody and am not a person who discriminates against anyone � ever.’ but davis tells this week’s national enquirer: ‘not true. she was forever using the ‘n-word.’ i told her not to use it. it was offensive. but she just laughed. she is a racist, plus an idiot. every black person she referred to was a ‘n- – - – -.’ ‘ davis, the grandson of recently deceased oil billionaire and movie mogul marvin davis and boyfriend of ‘o.c.’ starlet mischa barton, continued, ‘she uses the word all the time, and i’ve known her all of her life. it’s ‘n- – - – - this’ and ‘n- – - – - that.’ she’s a disgrace. she is a racist! ‘she puts down jews and other minorities, too. and i’m jewish. i found it depressing . . . i finally had enough of her attitude six months ago, and i finished with her. i don’t want anything to do with her. i don’t need anything from her. she is no longer my friend. she’s just not a nice person.’ davis said that he never heard hilton use racist language around her best friend and ‘simple life’ co-star nicole richie, who is black. ‘i know nicole,’ davis said. ‘she is a very good person.’ hilton’s publicist said the hotel heiress was on a plane yesterday and could not be reached. we also left a detailed message for richie’s rep to see if nicole wanted to defend her friend against davis’ charges, but we didn’t hear back. – {pagesix.com}

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oh my god, i’m so surprised. nicky hilton’s marriage to money manager todd meister appears to be in trouble already – less than two months after their shock las vegas wedding. the 21-year-old socialite and 33-year-old meister tied the knot in the nevada city’s las vegas wedding chapel in the early hours of august 15 after an 18-month courtship. according to us weekly, the couple are living on opposite sides of america and ‘working on an annulment,’ before they even hit their two-month wedding anniversary, because nicky believes at her young age ‘it’s just not a good time to be a wife.’ a spokesman for the family says, ‘as far as i can determine, the reports are speculative, and i make it a practice not to comment on speculation or rumor.’ however, us weekly editor in chief janice min maintains the
report is ‘beyond solid.’ – {the daily dish, sfgate.com}

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please say this isn’t so! athough, i have to admit that while rick salomon is super gross – i do think he’s kinda hot. wow, is kirsten dunst in a downward spiral. she’s gone from a romance with heartthrob and all-around nice guy jake gyllenhaal to hanging out with paris hilton’s sexcapades partner, rick salomon. according to an us weekly source, ‘now that she’s not with jake, [dunst is] enjoying her wild side.’ so when salomon and dunst were spotted last week at the l.a nightclubs guy’s and shelter, pals started to wonder. ‘she’s a cool chick,’ says salomon, ‘but we’re just friends.’ – {pagesix.com}

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3 cheers for joely! british actress joely richardson is reportedly dating her ‘nip/tuck’ co-star john hensley, who plays her son in the plastic surgery drama. richardson, 39, and hensley, 27, have embarked on a series of dates together and were most recently spotted canoodling at a los angeles cinema. an onlooker says, ‘they looked cozy and were not hiding the fact that they were together.’ – {the daily dish, sfgate.com}

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someone better call the wah-bulance for michael vartan! i’m told by alias sources that the chair setup has always been pretty much the same. everybody has one of those fab director’s chairs with their name on it (hooray for modern-day hollywood!), and they’re all together in a row-standard stuff. this, i’m told, is no longer the case. last week, mr. vartan’s seat was moved far, far away-like 25-30 yards-and around the corner. he’s in a hallway, all by himself. oh, okay, they tossed in a minion to accompany him to siberia, too kind. jen, natch, stayed put. whether this seating switcheroo was at vartan’s request (or hers), i do not know. ‘i just checked,’ a helpful alias exec type informed me. ‘and michael’s chair is a little distance from the others, but it’s insignificant.’ oh, really? a rep for vartan had this to say: ‘i’m not aware of any chairs being moved.’ so, gosh, shall we guess who’ll get killed off at the end in a grisly fashion? now, i should tell you that certain alias vets are starting to wonder if everyone’s getting killed off sooner than later. still, many sources are agreed on this: ‘vartan’s head is definitely on the block,’ pooped a single, solitary insider who regularly inhales vartan’s secondhand smoke. oops! i did it again-gave away something i wasn’t supposed to! that’s right. mr. v. has been hittin’ the death sticks again. i can hardly find fault, as i used to smoke three packs a day. hopefully, he’ll see what a damn hunk he is and stop killin’ himself-soon. but i ain’t his ma. i wonder if the return o’ the bad habit has something to do with j.g. being a health nut ‘n’ all? you know ms. g. goes mental over smoking, doncha? sure mikey just forgot about that little personal no-nic rule, doncha agree? garner’s reaction? ‘smoldering,’ sniffs a prime alias source. – {the awful truth, eonline.com}

you didnt hear it from me…by nikkib    issue no. 19 on popbytes well, it looks like the ‘real’ britney & kevin wedding is happening next week october 16th. sources say that they have the entire four seasons on the big island in hawaii booked. i, for one, am thrilled! i have no doubt the wedding will be over the top with trash, but it’s the kind of trash we love in the old britney – not the new, dirty feet britney.

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speaking of trash, i’m so into tv right now! just when i thought i didn’t have room for any new shows i go and add a shitload. here are my favorites this fall:


veronica mars
veronica lives in neptune, ca where you’re either rich or work for the rich people. her dad was the sheriff, therefore even though her family wasn’t rich, she had some cred. last year veronica was dating the most popular boy in school and was best friends with his sister. she was the ‘in’ crowd. but then the best friend ends up murdered and veronica’s father, the sheriff, accuses the dead girl’s father (who is the most powerful man in neptune) of being involved. veronica’s dad gets fired, she and her boyfriend break up, her mom leaves town and veronica is now a social pariah. a private eye social pariah! veronica’s dad starts his own private investigation firm and veronica helps him with his cases. however, the more involved veronica becomes with her dad’s work the more she realizes that there’s one big case that he’s not letting her in on he’s still working on the case to find veronica’s best friend’s murderer. ‘veronica mars’ is a little like ‘pretty in pink ‘or ‘some kind of wonderful ‘ meets ‘buffy.’ hmmm…when i put it like that it sounds like it would kinda suck – but it doesn’t! it’s on tuesday nights on upn. check it out!


america’s next top model
this is the best reality show out there. insecure, bitchy models duking it out all while being critiqued by janice dickson, ‘the first supermodel!’ how could you possible resist?!


wife swap
this show is priceless abc picks women who are complete opposites to trade places for a week. there are lots of fights, bratty kids, and gross husbands. my own husband almost can’t watch this show because it makes him so uncomfortable, so i’ll recommend this one with a warning that it might not be suitable for everyone.


desperate housewives
despite the annoying promos running constantly on abc, i decided i just had to give this one a try. i love felicity huffman!! i thought the pilot was good. but what up with nicolette sheridan’s face??!! she looked a little joan rivers-esque. and did you know that the ‘supermodel’ wife (eva something-or-other) is dating jc chasez?! so gross. i’m hoping i can get over the little things to love this show.


there are more, but i’ll just start you out with those. seriously though, set your tivo for ‘veronica mars.’ and don’t forget to check out ‘life as we know it’ on abc tonight i have a good ‘my so-called life’ feeling about it!

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poor bridget. white stripes singer jack white and hollywood actress renee zellweger have split up after nearly two years together. – {imdb.com}

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what is it with paris and the video camera? i really need to know! paris hilton is fighting off accusations she made racist comments at a new york party. last week, american newspaper new pork post reported that in a recently surfaced 12-hour videotape, hilton is shown speaking with two african-american men, who ask her if she would model their fashion line. the publication reported that hilton, standing with pal brandon davis, was polite to the men, but called them ‘dumb n*****s’ after they left, according to british reporter carole aye maung, who reviewing the alleged tape. maung says, ‘two… guys begin talking to her. she’s being very, very sweet to them. (but) she definitely uses the n-word. it’s so cruel, because they were so lovely, and she was being so lovely to them. ‘ but furious hilton hits back, ‘anyone who knows me knows that this is not me. i am deeply hurt by recent reports. i am not a person who discriminates against anyone – ever. ‘ hilton’s best pal nicole richie adds, ‘she doesn’t have a prejudiced bone in her body. ‘ according to maung, the tape also includes footage of hilton ‘making love’ with ex-boyfriend nick carter in the back of a car and greeting one-time boyfriend jason shaw in the nude. – {the daily dish, sfgate.com}

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so, matt damon was smoking 2 packs of smokes a day. i guess that just proves what a funk his career has been in (and please don’t point out the success of the ‘bourne’ movies to me they suck!). if you’re smoking 2 packs a day, that’s all you’re doing. matt damon is resorting to hypnotism to help him give up his smoking. the ‘bourne supremacy’ star has had a two-pack a day habit for over 10 years and is so desperate to stop that he has been visiting a hypnotist to cure him, says a source. ‘he’s tried a couple of things before, but nothing has worked,’ says the insider. ‘we’re hopeful this time.’ ‘it’s working,’ damon’s rep happily told the scoop. ‘his first treatment was in august and he hasn’t smoked since then.’ – {the scoop, msnbc.com}

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ted c. blind item alert! defamers guessed lloyd dobler, er, john cusack which is clearly wrong. my pick is orlando bloom. he just can’t be straight, can he?? so, we got jolly johnny headin’ outta h-town and taking over a certain fabulous harbor hotel in a rather famous port city recently. j2, in town for some biz, really worked over his fancy-schmancy hotel suite. i think what happened was that jolly’s guy buds (whom he flew in for fun and dude-buns in the sun) were so grateful for mr. j.’s generosity that they, well, just loved the iconoclast movie star to death. perhaps they were helped by some chickers who may have secretly sneaked up the service entrance, but my auberge sources never saw ‘em. fluid stains of most every (entirely human) variety were left throughout the pricey digs. it was so bad, the posh inn’s cleaning staff refused to take care of the mess. what happens in a sitch like that, i wonder? regardless, i think even j2′s unflappably jolly relative-also in the biz-would be put out. and trust moi, it takes a lot to make that relation lose it. – {the awful truth, eonline.com}

you didnt hear it from me…by nikkib    issue no. 18 on popbytes i’m such a bad gossip to leave you guys hanging for two weeks! But seriously, did anything really happen? So Brit got married to her pimp – who cares?! I think the best part of the whole thing is that they had a CASH BAR. She’s worth over $100 million and she can’t afford to buy 20 people drinks? Oh and let’s not forget that their song was Journey’s ‘Lights’ and it played on a boom box. First of all, what in the hell does San Francisco have to do with their romance? And secondly no stereo? She’s reached new levels of trashiness that aren’t even fun anymore! But don’t get me wrong - I love Journey.

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the only other thing we missed dishing about was the emmy’s!
I thought Joely Richardson (of my absolute fave show ‘nip/tuck’) was the best dressed woman there.
And I thought the best dressed man was my very own friend, Jens! Jens even made E!’s ‘Fashion
Police!’ Ok, so he was shown standing behind William Shatner, who they panned as ‘worst dressed,’
but still! It’s the big time, baby!

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speaking of the emmy’s – how you doin?
Could it be that a sitcom star wasn’t in much of a rush to head home? So say my pals at the
Governor’s Ball who tell me that the married-with-child chunk was enjoying his liquor and wanted to
take libido out for a spin on the homo side. It might have been bad enough when he started telling
anyone who’d listen that it had been a while since he’d ‘had some’, but when he resorted to using
his character’s pick-up lines on virtually anyone who walked by (including some Emmy staff members),
it was downright embarrassing. Just goes to show that when it comes right down to it, even someone
who brings you coffee can be there for you if you wait around long enough. (Filth2go.com)

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this is mischa barton and her oily bo-hunk, no doubt.
Which TV starlet and her filthy rich boyfriend were constantly ducking out of the VIP lounge at the
fashion week tents? Returning with runny eyes, sniffly noses and jumping jaws, we bet it wasn’t hay
fever. – {pagesix.com}

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finally, an explanation for those get-ups!
Sexy ‘Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow’ co-star Bai Ling says her stay in a mental hospital
made her a better actress – but she’s still haunted by voices in her head. ‘I hear eight separate
voices,’ Ling says. ‘I have given them each names and I have to shout out to them sometimes to shut
up. Sometimes they tell me that they don’t like living in New York. But they are my friends although
sometimes I say, ‘You are too demanding.’ They are like spirits.’ In a rambling chat with PAGE SIX,
Ling added, ‘I am writing a book called ‘A Clock Falling From the Sky and Dreams of Tibet’ about my
experience starting when at 14 I was in the Chinese Liberation Army in Tibet for three years as an
actress teaching Chinese values to Tibetans.’ Ling, who plays a henchwoman of the mysterious Dr.
Totenkopf in the sci-fi box-office smash ‘Sky Captain,’ continued: ‘I was damaged by what I did in
Tibet, it was twisted. My time there was very sexual, but also innocent and sad. I was with all
these older men, falling in love many times, which was forbidden and I was punished for it. Then I
wanted to kill myself because I felt that life had become meaningless. I was in a dark place and I
was lost. ‘So I went into a mental hospital where they gave me electric shock treatment close to a
hundred times. After I got the shock treatment I would stand in one place for the whole day without
moving. They gave me medicine every day so that I was numb all the time. It was like a prison…I
would have these horrible nightmares of being eaten by tigers, leopards and jaguars. ‘I had those
nightmares for years afterwards until one day I realized that in another life I had been a leopard
myself and then the nightmares stopped. That was because I hunted a leopard in South Africa and when
I saw the leopard, I realized then that I had once been a leopard because they say that the leopard
only lets you see it if it wants to be seen. ‘I felt like I was connected to that leopard but I am
now in a human form. I can feel that wild side when I am dancing. I got out of the mental hospital
when I was 17 by telling the doctors that I was an actress and I was just pretending that I wanted
to kill myself and that I wasn’t really sick. I became a great actress because I had to be to get
out of that hospital.’ – {pagesix.com}

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who else thinks orlando and kate bosworth are over?
Orlando Bloom arrived at L.A.’s Spider Club for Us Weekly’s party late last Friday night without
girlfriend Kate Bosworth, but instead a ‘Malibu Barbie’ blonde in tow. ‘He danced with every girl in
the room,’ said a witness. The dark-haired actor also asked specifically that no one take any
pictures of him. – {Elisa Lipsky-Karasz, NYPost.com}

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EXACTLY!
Isn’t it funny how Dualstar, the Olsen twins’ company, wants to sue those poor schmoes who made the
‘Save Mary-Kate’ T-shirt, but no one’s going after The Star and The Enquirer, who said she was in
rehab for cocaine, not anorexia? What do you suppose that means? – {Gatecrashers, NYDN.com}

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file usher under ‘who cares’ for me. i hope he is dating naomi campbell – they would be an awesome match.
Forget Alicia Keyes – Usher’s new lady-love is Naomi Campbell. The two have managed to keep it a
secret, but inside sources say that when Usher and Campbell were caught canoodling in Miami over the
weekend, it wasn’t the first time. ‘Usher asked Naomi to perform with him at the VMA’s,’ our source
said. ‘She’s performing with him this week in Miami…she is absolutely besotted. He is so nice
and lovely to her. She is head over heels in love with him.’ Campbell’s rep said: ‘Naomi and Usher
are enjoying hanging out together.’ – {pagesix.com}

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i’m this close to adding marilyn manson to my celebrity boyfriends list.
Did you see him on ‘Dinner for Five?’ He’s just so scary looking and NOT in a good way!
‘I’ll tell you what. I’m someone who carries a lot of straws, but I don’t drink milk shakes at all.’ – Marilyn Manson on his drug use in Rolling Stone Magazine…

you didnt hear it from me…by nikkib    issue no. 17 on popbytes how in the hell did it get to be september?! before i know it, i’ll be knee deep in my first midwestern winter since the late 90′s. i don’t have any of the clothes for that! what kind of shoes do people wear in winter? i’ve forgotten! seriously, i need help. send me some ideas or i’ll just get these. it says that they’re perfect for a winter day or a mini skirt! how perf! don’t kill me for the short column this week. the holiday totally screwed me up and now i have a sick baby. i’ll try to find extra special fun things for you next week. ps. anyone who’s not watching ‘nip/tuck’ is totally missing out!

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these girls are so much better than paris hilton!
jenna and barbara bush lived up to their hard-partying reputation while
in new york supporting their pop, president bush, during the republican
convention, according to our spies around town. the twosome kicked off a
week of fun last saturday at chelsea hot spot 17, where, we’re told,
they partied with a group of 20 guests till the early hours. ‘jenna
seemed more wild than barbara,’ said a witness. ‘they probably got
through about three bottles of level vodka, and they were given a tour
of the club by management.’ the conservative cuties’ next big night was
wednesday at sixth avenue nightclub avalon, where they were in the crowd
smoking cigarettes and pumping their fists to kid rock, who was
performing on stage. ‘they [and their entourage of about 25] drank
$4,500 dollars worth of drinks bottles and bottles of vodka,’ says a
club insider. ‘then, having been comped all the alcohol, they left a $48
tip. we thought 1 per cent was kind of outrageous, considering they are
the president’s daughters.’ on thursday night, after the president gave
his big speech at madison square garden, jenna was out again returning
to 17 for more good times. a spy told page six’s tom sykes that jenna
showed around 3 a.m. with a group of up to 50 people: ‘she was dancing
around the club with a group of rather attractive fashion industry-type
girls and another six or seven men who were either young republicans or
secret service,’ says a source who was with the party. ‘there was one
particular, really preppy-looking guy who she was dancing with the whole
time who looked like he might be her boyfriend,’ our source said. ‘at
4:15 a.m., they closed the club and ushered jenna and her posse upstairs
to a suite where there was a private open bar and big red pool table.
jenna’s friends played 8-ball quite poorly. ‘the elevator was broken, so
we all had to walk up the stairs. she kicked off her heels and wandered
around the space barefooted. around 5:30, the staff started losing their
patience and finally sent everyone home.’there was no repeat of the
poor tipping that the avalon staff experienced. a 17 club staffer said,
‘yes, they were here, but they were actually great to the staff and
tipped big. in fact, they even called on friday to say thanks for a
great night, so we are hoping to see them again.’ – {pagesix.com}

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to tell you the truth, i’ve never been on board with this romance. i think katie could do better.
the love affair between ‘american pie’ actor chris klein and ‘dawson’s
creek’ starlet katie holmes hit a speed bump over the weekend. the
couple, who’ve been engaged for over a year, had a fight last friday
while dining at l.a. eatery maggiano’s. ‘they came in holding hands, sat
alone, and during the dinner klein was heard delivering classic break-up
lines like ‘i need space,’ and ‘it’s not you, it’s me,’ ‘ our source
said. before dessert, holmes was in tears. but holmes’ rep assures us
the couple was merely arguing over their new house not breaking up.
holmes has been in england for the past month filming ‘batman begins.’
- {pagesix.com}

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julia roberts and pam anderson – bff’s. why doesn’t this surprise me?
julia roberts is receiving baby advice from pamela anderson as she
prepares for the birth of twins early next year — and the pair have
become close friends. anderson, who has two sons from her failed
marriage to tommy lee, has been filling roberts in on everything from
giving birth to motherly duties. a friend of the 37-year-old former
‘baywatch’ beauty says, ‘pam has recommended julia to try a home birth
in a birthing pool. she’s even referred her to a support group that
helped her. ‘she and julia have become quite close. pam sees a lot of
herself in julia. she remembers bringing up kids in the public eye. ‘pam
is happy to be there for her, even at the birth if that’s what she and
danny want.’ – {the daily dish, sfgate.com}

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tom cruise – heterosexual giant
‘if i stood next to tom cruise, my ruler suit would reveal him to be a
feeble and delicate 5′ 6′ tall,’ notes victor lewis-smith in the london
evening standard, ‘but as the celebrity scientologist is exceedingly
litigious and wealthy, i shall describe him here as a red-blooded,
heterosexual giant of a man.’ – {the scoop, msnbc.com}