oh kids! all good things must come to an end! read below for the 3rd season wrap-up of the apprentice - congrats to kendra - and huge gigantic thanks to my gal/pal dana - who has wrapped up this show for the
past 13 weeks! and now she is off to greece to relax! but don't fret dana will return - thanks again d! you rock & roll! mk xxoo
and then there was one.
in what seemed to be a fairly lackluster live episode of the apprentice last night, mr. trump chose his next apprentice - and i have to say, it's great knowing that finally, he's working with a woman!
we already knew that this season's finale was only going to be an hour long (unlike last season's song and dance that dragged on for an unbelievable amount of time). we got to see this season's applicants, all tucked away like two very odd juries. again, it was a fairly uneventful evening (although, danny - fabulous suit!)
so, much like a lot of us already assumed, last week's final challenge was a foreshadowing of what was about to happen in the final boardroom. overall, everyone claimed it was such a tough decision to choose between tana (what was up with her hair?) and kendra. both were so strong and yet both had their issues as well.
but, in the long run, kendra was made the apprentice. so congrats to a strong woman in business - don't make the rest of us look bad by giving us a bad name.
so, as a final wrap up, i wanted to point out some of the more bizarre, more entertaining moments from last night's episode:
a) tana's hair. what the hell was she thinking? she did know she was on live TV, right? she looked as though she had been out in the rain wearing one of those disposable, plastic rain hoods that my great grandmother in brooklyn would wear. it was like a matted wet dog on her head.
b) kristen's blondeness. whoa. who was the hairdresser that looked kristen straight in the eye and said, "oh my god, your dark eyes, dark eyebrows and mildly olive complexion could totally pull off blonde"?
c) tana's outburst. okay, so we all learned last night that tana was the innovator of the round shape of the pontiac solstice brochure...but was it just me, or was she completely not herself. i mean, i understand that a live audience can certainly give someone the jitters, especially when your next major life change is sitting on the line. but, i swear it was like watching farrah fawcett on letterman all over again. girl, get it together!
d) kelly's commerical. so, it should have come as no surprise that we would see the last seasons' apprentices. bill, always looking professional and mildly cocky was there as well as kelly. i can't stand him. maybe it's my complete loathing of the military since i can't stand bush and the republicans...and it's just a political issue for me. but, did anyone catch the military commercial they ran during the show? nothing like seeing someone like kelly who's been out of the service for some time now, lugging his gut and fat ass around hard-core military training. and of course, mr. trump had to be a part of it. just in case anyone missed it, the correlation we were supposed to make is that if you're in the military, you'll be made smart and savvy - ready for business in the big city with mr. trump.
e) the choices for apprenticeship projects. okay, so let's review some of the options given to the likes of bill and kelly: manage a new building in chicago, manage my holdings in new york, manage a brand new golf course, etc. etc. etc. so now that we have two women up for the apprentice, can you give them anything that would suggest their weakness as players in the business world more. so, "ladies" you get to pick from the miss fuckin' america pageant or this mansion i'm building in palm springs?! give me a break. and who is this "mansion" for? notice how that was never mentioned? wouldn't it be funny if kendra was managing a property for mr. trump's own personal interests?
so, kids. thanks for sticking with me for 13 weeks of fun, tears and tobacco chewing. soon we'll have another set of applicants vying to do what it takes to work for the trumpster...and, we'll also have some working for ms. stewart. see you soon - now i'm off to greece! ooh-pa! xxoo dana!
hey kids - tgif - and next week is the season finale! im still rooting for tana - but i think kendra may take it in the end - we shall see - enjoy dana's column below - and check out her email from ex-apprentice danny! i love that he came to check out popbytes! i'm so outtie for now!
although last night's episode of the apprentice did not include a firing,
the excitement was still high as we watched tana and kendra compete in their
final missions before one is selected as mr. trump's apprentice.
i really had all my money on tana...but i was blown away by kendra. she
managed her team gracefully, she kept her vendors and sponsors happy and she
pulled off an amazing event. i wish i could say the same about miss tana.
it was obvious that the stress of her team members and the event as a whole
was getting to her. i mean, she actually showed no concern that she was
keeping the mayor waiting - she offered him a doughnut! her attitude and bashing
of people like chris completely made herself look unprofessional and appear
as though she has trouble focusing and managing large-scale projects.
so, when it came down to it, kendra and tana were both back in the
boardroom...attacking each other with more class and dignity than we've seen anyone
before. at the very end of last night's episode, mr. trump invited the teams
back into the boardroom while the managers sat outside. unfortunately, we'll
have to wait until next week's season finale to see what danny, erin,
michael, chris, brian and kristen have to say about tana and kendra.
but in the meantime, you don't have to wait to hear from danny! i received
an e-mail and photo from him yesterday...he's been checking out popbytes!!!
Hey,
I finally checked out popbytes Apprentice stuff.
Very cool.
You certainly are a great writer and are into the whole thing!!
Sorry it took me so long to respond.
Rock on.
Danny kastner
hey kids! here be dana's latest musing on the apprentice it's just the final two now! two women! a woman shall claim apprentice victory at last! you go tana!
so, the commercials didn't lie. in the first 15 minutes, mr. trump brought the final three down to the final two. four various high-profile CEOs interviewed each of the final three candidates; craig, kendra and tana. overwhelmingly, each CEO felt that craig lacked any "substance" and so mr. trump's decision was made quite easy - this year's apprentice will DEFINITELY be a woman! it's about freakin' time!
so, we learn that the final challenges for both apprentices-to-be include kendra's best buy video gaming event and tana's event at chelsea piers to help convince the olympic committee to bring the 2012 olympics to new york city.
ah...but you knew they're be a clincher...mr. trump hired three "employees" for each project manager. and you knew that they'd be previous contestants that had been fired. but he definitely picked the bottom of the barrel. working with kendra are the scatter-brained danny, michael and erin. tana has the most volatile people from her original street smarts team including chris, brian and kristen.
next week's episode should be killer. i mean, last night we witnessed danny totally screw up the first impression the team had with EA Sports. did you hear him start with a homemade jingle?!
so, stay tuned. feel free to e-mail us with who you think will take home the prize of being donald trump's apprentice. i'm rooting for tana - but i'm realizing that kendra has an excellent shot as well. who will crack under pressure?
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hey boys & girls! here is dana's latest musing on the apprentice - thanks to her as always! the final three now! you go tana!
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i swear to god, i was on the edge of my seat last night. last night's apprentice started with the remaining four players meeting up at trump's flashy towers. because alex was the last remaining player on net worth, he was asked to select a magna player to join him. although it would have been cool to see a head-on competition between street smarts and book smarts, he picked tana. this was a super-strategic move because craig and kendra are explosive together. the task: design a commemorative t-shirt for hane's 50th anniversary...each team worked with a pop artist.
however, kudos need to go to kendra and craig. their brilliant marketing idea of targeting their artist's fans, was brilliant...just brilliant.
but here's where the sweat came into play...
a team net worth lost. oh no! alex brought tana down.
b tana...you need to stop obsessing over the bedazzler. i always thought old ladies that lived in their house with 37 cats owned the bedazzler, but...tana...staten island? that place is a freakin' land fill.
c for a moment, it was so obvious that trump was going to fire tana in the boardroom...
but thank god tana stepped up and reminded trump of her wins and alex's loses. so, we bid you farewell, alex. another lawyer bites the dust. thank goodness. so we're down to three: tana, craig and kendra. this should be an interesting race. tana needs to step up her game if she wants to win. hopefully last night's boardroom gave her the fire under her ass that she needed to remind herself that she can't get too comfortable in this game. sweat the small stuff, and you'll never win.
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hey kids! oh i so needed friday! here are dana's latest musings on the apprentice - thanks to her as always for her sassy column! it's getting down to the wire! the final four! go tana!
for anyone that caught last night's apprentice show...you may have seen a
few mistakes. rather than discuss the show as a whole, and give a synopsis,
etc., etc. i thought i would run through the major mistakes of the evening:
1 Alex decides to forgo from meeting with the executives from Staples.
What kind of a freakin' moron doesn't try to warm up the judges, get inside
their heads, ask them what they want to see? Gee, Alex...you're so freakin'
brilliant.
2 Alex thinks Bren should conduct only 2 focus groups. This one cracked me
up. First off, a focus group needs to be a group - duh! Not two people
that Bren finds through the yellow pages. Did you really think office managers
you cold called at work would take the time to answer your lame-ass
questions? Um, Alex - here's an idea...go to an office supply store...let's say
STAPLES, and ask people you find there (which would most likely consist of working
people, during the day) to see what they'd like to see...or at least to find
out why their desks are always unorganized.
3 Alex's brilliant idea of a huge piece of equipment to solve the office
clutter problem. I swear, Alex was so in love with his design...I'm surprised
we didn't see him hump that piece of shit plexi-glass cover. I work in an
office (but it's super cool) and I know that the last thing I need to help me
unclutter is another desk that I can...clutter. Duh! I mean, the design had
so many things wrong with it. Nothing pulled out, the "fabulous" baskets
could only be accessed if you remove the hokey plexi-glass cover. Not genius.
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4 Alex looking Mr. Trump, George and Caroline in the boardroom and swearing
to them that their desk-o-shit was the best design ever. Come on. What did
you think they would say? "Oh Alex, those executives and managers at
Staples are fuckin' morons. Your piece-o-shit desk is so great for keeping clutter
at bay. In fact, we're going to bring team Magna in and fire one of them."
Please. You made so many mistakes.
5 Bren admitting to Mr. Trump that he's not good at taking risks. Bren,
what do you think business is all about? You need to take risks if you want to
go places. That's what business is. Now law, on the other hand, is guided
by a written set of rules that you must abide by, so I can see where the two
are different. But if you were hoping to get to the final two, you just
screwed yourself.
and so, based on one mistake (compared to the myriad of mistakes made by
alex), bren was let go by mr. trump last night. bren was a cool guy...a
southern gentleman with a saucy side. i have to admit, it was sweet to hear him in
his taxi cab drive away from trump towers. he obviously loves his wife, his
kids and the south...and being away from all of them reminded him how much he
missed it. good luck in life, bren. from all of us here at popbytes.
side note craig and kendra...the drama never stops. i'll be curious to see
what happens next week when we're down to four. will trump have the two of
them work together? although i'm not her biggest fan, craig has been
incredibly condescending to her and the "little girl" comment last night was
completely uncalled for. stay tuned!
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hey kids! its getting down to the final five! read on below for dana's latest take on the apprentice! i agree with her chris has a heart - and i got weepy too! popbytes out on a friday!
so, middway through last night's episode...i was ready to come into work and
write my article, completely slamming chris for not being strong enough with
alex when he saw that alex didn't get the right shots of the car during the
photo shoot. or for not putting a stop on bren's copy - which was incredibly
stale. or...better yet, when chris said in one of his little "interviews"
that he never fails (remember your little arrest on sunday, sweetie?!).
but then...in a huge shocker, when chris was fired by mr. trump...his eyes
welled up, his chin began to quiver and he started to cry. this wasn't the
kind of whiney cry, or a sissy-girl cry. this was a full-on cry of pent up
emotion...of disappointment...of being overwhelmed.
and to make matters worse...it made me cry! so, rather than giving my
standard cutting comments and criticism today. i'd like to let everyone take a
moment of silence to remember the drama, the entertainment and the all-on anger
that we won't get to experience anymore now that chris is no longer in the
running to be mr. trump's apprentice.
now, i'm not saying that he was a star player, or even that he had all his
marbles. but after last night's display of emotion, it's obvious that chris
has his own personal demons and issues that he needs to get through and i wish
him nothing but luck in that regard.
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so, we're down to alex, bren, craig, kendra and tana. i'm still feeling a
win for tana. but alex, who was a strong player in earlier episodes, has
showed some laziness and inadequacies. i mean, last night he was so ho-hum when
he realized he didn't catch any of the shots that chris and bren discussed
with him before they left him at the photo studio...bren, i think he's a little
southern spitfire and i'll be interested to see how far he'll get. who
knows, he could be in the final two.
i'm concerned for craig and kendra because the two don't get along - at all.
so one is bound to be fired in an upcoming episode. i guess we'll all have
to watch and see. 18 have been whittled down to 5 - this is when things get
good! - xxoo dana
hey kids - i love a gal who is on top of her show! look what happened over the weekened!
i bet you're used to hearing from me after the thursday episodes of the apprentice...but when apprentice drama calls, i be listening.
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chris, the tobacco chewing, angry little 21 year-old from the "street smarts" side was arrested saturday at the hard rock hotel & casino in tampa. chris was taken into custody at around 3:30am and placed behind bars for "disorderly conduct". after posting $250 bail, he was released less than 24 hours later.
according to police reports, chris was causing a scene in the lobby...upsetting casino patrons. typical chris, he was yelling and cursing and was unable to be calmed down. apparently he was in town to celebrate the birthday of my now least favorite apprentice, john (you know, the sexist jerk-off pig) when he flipped out about a $20 cover charge to get into the cocktail lounge.
stay tuned for more information... |
hey kids! TGIF! its getting down to the final six! next week looks crazy! read on below for dana's latest take on the apprentice! popbytes out for now!
what a twist. last night's episode of the apprentice really threw me for a
loop...
so both teams get the opportunity to design clothing for american eagle
outfitters that allow teens to have easy access to popular technology. team
magna, led by tana (love her!) started off on the right foot by conducting
"scientific research" in the store, asking teenagers which devices are most
important to them...
team net worth, on the other hand, started by running over the best buy
where they purchased a laptop, cell phones, video games and an iPod. chris,
however, made the first mistake of the evening...he lost/left his credit card at
best buy. the time wasted in finding the card again...we'll, i'm not 100%
sure if this had anything to do with the team's failure.
to make a one-hour episode short (ala Cliff Notes), it came as no shock that
net worth lost due to angie's spazz-out at the presentation and alex's
inability to get the team to the presentation on time.
in the boardroom, i was amazed how chris really was coming out unscathed.
the man lost the money, he's crazy and...i'm just waiting for his loose cannon
to erupt again. but i do need to give him props for appearing to try to
make a change in his life. he has seemed to give up his bad "chew" habit.
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anyway, based on her performance, angie was fired. i loved that girl...she
was spunky, maternal, and an all around strength for her team.
next week's episode should be awesome. it appears that whoever gets fired
causes some sort of drama outside of the conference room.
predictions:
tana - she'll definitely take this one all the way!
hey kids! gosh it's april! and tomorrow night we have to put our clocks forward - and we lose one hour of sleep this weekend! the horror! read on below for the latest update on last night's apprentice!
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yet another great episode of the apprentice. in last night's task, both teams needed to work with domino's pizza to create two new pizza recipes and sell their pizzas out of 'mobile shops'.
after trump introduced the challenge by adding that he loves meatballs on his pizza, it was no shock that the brown-nosing team members would each create their own rendition of a meatball pizza. unfortunately, this meant that at times, the episode did get a little boring...their pizzas were basically the same. so, the challenge became more about marketing, selling and your standard amount of team drama.
team net worth, now with alex on their side, started off with a rocky start because project manager, stephanie was sent to deliver a few pizzas to a construction site in brooklyn. who knew delivery traveled on the subway?! i have to say, i really do love angie. she adds a maternal and calming element to her team. but let's not forget...that team includes loose-cannon, chris. apparently there was an altercation between him and alex (could he be a little stressed without his chewing tobacco?).
so, into the boardroom go both teams...to only find out that magna won by a few hundred dollars (and a lot less drama). stephanie, as project manager, decides to give angie immunity and brings alex and chris to the boardroom.
just when i thought chris was a goner...stephanie is fired due to poor management skills.
chris - your time is numbered...if his team loses next week, there's no doubt that he'll be out.
if anyone has been watching, yahoo has a great apprentice fantasy game. my vote is for tana to take it all...that girl has spunk!
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hey kids - a short and sweet sum up from pal dana on the apprentice - oh that erin just had to run her mouth!
"last night was fantastic! however, due to the holiday weekend, i've kept my musing fairly brief.
• tana...i love you. you and craig were absolute stars last night.
• erin...thank god i won't have to look at you anymore. trump was right. you're annoying and you think you're so fabulous as a 26 year-old lawyer. sweetheart, lawyers are a dime a dozen in philadelphia and you're no better than satan...on a good day! |
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• chris...i have a feeling that if your team doesn't win next week, you're out. your anger and rage is a sign of immaturity and a lack of confidence.
have a great holiday weekend! xo dana!"
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