A breakdown of Nadya Suleman’s porn video

Yesterday, I posted a video of Nadya ‘Octomom’ Suleman hyping up her new masturbation porn video by going on Howard Stern and riding a masturbation machine, and you people just … you just ate that up. You pounced on that like a lioness on a wounded gazelle. Honest to God, it pulled in some of the highest numbers I’ve ever seen, I’m really not sure how I feel about this, but clearly you sick bastards want more of Octomom pleasuring herself, so here’s a review of her steamy scenes from I Heart Chaos.

Scene three is more typical boring stuff. She starts off trying to look all seductive in front of a pool, before moving to a bed and stripping and getting to business. Again, its mediocre borderline softcore. She spends half the time at a weird angle so you never see the goods, and the rest of the time from the tits up. Towards the end you finally get what most morbid curiosities have been wanting to see, a good clean shot of her baby hole. Surprisingly, its not horrible. Its kinda weird looking, but its not as disgusting as I would have bet on.

[...]

Scene five is where the good stuff starts. This is just a straight up masturbating scene, while shes in the tub. You finally get a good front and center unobstructed view of her snatch, and again, its not bad, but something about it just seems off. I can’t tell if she’s had a vaginaplasty, or if her vagina just looks like she’s had one. She also full on penetrates herself in this one, for the first time. Its all pretty standard lame porn crap, honestly.

You can click over to read the entire thing, and honestly, you might as well do it. The poor bastard sat through the whole thing just to satisfy your curiosity, the least you can do is offer him a page view. Anyway, just to delve further into just how horrifying this whole process is, here’s a clip from Jimmy Kimmel Live where random people on the street react to seeing pictures from Octomom’s porn video.

Nadya 'Octomom' Suleman

Jeremy Feist About Jeremy Feist

Jeremy Feist is an (ahem) entertainer from Toronto, Canada. He writes, acts, and performs on stage, and has been a writer for Popbytes for almost three years now. He lives in Toronto with his boyfriend, his incredibly dumb but cute puppy, and his immortal cat.

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